I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
Ketchup is God's man juice
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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