eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
