I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
