at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Randomize
