At least make sure they are 18
Why
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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