Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
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