I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Randomize
