Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
