I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
