So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
