Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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