i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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