And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
