In the future we'll all be gay
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
