Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize