i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
