just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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