My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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