If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
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