Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
That's when you crack a 10am beer
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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