I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
