did you get engaged???
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
