But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
