his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize
