Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
home. puking in laundry basket.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
it's like heaven, but drunker
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
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