I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
