Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Randomize
