its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
