Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
ttyl tear gas
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
