Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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