I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Randomize
