I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I just want to make out with him forever
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Randomize
