So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I need a beard to bite.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
tell me about the eggs
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize