Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
