Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Randomize
