You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
