What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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