How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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