Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
