Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
