the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Randomize
