Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
he just fucked me for my cheese..
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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