so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Dignity is for republicans.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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