i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Randomize
