All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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