How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
