My first STD was from a foam party
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Naked Twister starts at high noon
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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