Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
