508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
