in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
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